Published on and written by Cyril Jarnias
Leaving your country to settle in France, whether for studies, work, or a personal adventure, often comes with a surprise guest: homesickness. Even when you have “always dreamed of living in France,” the reality of daily life far from loved ones, in another language and another system, can be unsettling. Studies show that the vast majority of people who move abroad – up to 70 to 80% – experience this sometimes painful nostalgia at one point or another.
To tame homesickness, it is advisable to understand this phenomenon, establish reassuring routines, and create social connections. Treating yourself to familiar food, using expatriate networks, and adapting to the French pace of life are also useful strategies. It’s important to recognize when it becomes necessary to seek professional help.
Understanding Homesickness to Better Get Through It
Homesickness is neither a weakness nor a “failure” of expatriation. Psychologists compare it to a form of separation anxiety: you have lost your bearings, your network, your sense of being competent in everyday life. It’s a normal reaction to a massive change.
Research shows that the feeling of unease during expatriation affects both adults and children, often after the initial excitement phase. It frequently peaks around six months, when novelty gives way to routines and daily constraints, without the emotional support from the home country.
Symptoms are very varied. On an emotional level, there is sadness, irritability, nostalgia, feelings of loneliness. On the physical side: fatigue, sleep disturbances, headaches, digestive issues. Mentally, thoughts revolve around the home country, sometimes idealizing the “before” and taking a very critical view of France. Socially, you may tend to withdraw, avoiding new encounters due to a lack of energy.
The important thing is to keep in mind that these reactions are common: several studies mention rates of 20 to 90% of people affected during the first year abroad. Experiencing them does not mean expatriation is a bad idea, but rather that the brain is in the process of adapting.
The Role of Culture Shock in What You’re Feeling
Homesickness is closely linked to culture shock. Sociologists and psychologists describe this process as a sort of emotional rollercoaster. The most classic model speaks of four main phases: the honeymoon, frustration, adjustment, and then adaptation.
In France, this curve can be accentuated by very concrete elements: languages and accents, codes of politeness, clothing differences, administrative complexity, meal times, business opening hours, work habits. A simple fill-up at an automatic gas pump or a visit to the prefecture can make you lose your sense of “knowing how to live.”
Researcher Steven Rhinesmith describes the process of intercultural adaptation as a succession of ten non-linear stages. It includes phases of euphoria and depression, followed by superficial adjustments and then deep anchoring. This journey can include setbacks, for example during holidays, after a difficult family call, or facing a gray, humid Parisian winter, even after a period of acclimatization.
Recognizing that you are in a phase of culture shock – rather than hastily concluding “France is not for me” – avoids making radical decisions on a wave of blues.
Establish Reassuring Routines in Your Daily French Life
To stabilize this emotional rollercoaster, routine is a very effective weapon. Exchange students and digital nomads who have lived several years abroad all say the same thing: without daily reference points, the feeling of drifting and nostalgia worsens.
The idea is not to reproduce your previous life exactly, but to create a daily framework that reassures you: a relatively fixed wake-up time, morning rituals, time slots dedicated to work or studies, structured breaks, a moment to move your body, and then a real break in the evening.
In France, the standard work week is 35 hours, with days generally organized from 8 am to 12 pm and 2 pm to 6 pm. The lunch break, culturally important, often lasts an hour, or even more in some regions. Making the most of this break for a real meal or a walk, rather than eating in front of a screen, allows for a real mental pause in the middle of the day and contributes to well-being.
For example, you could imagine:
– A morning ritual: coffee or tea, a few lines in a journal, then a brisk walk to the bakery or nearby park.
– An “anchor” at the end of the day: a hot shower, a TV series in the original language from your home country via a VPN, a call to a loved one, then reading.
An expatriate traveling with her child talks about her “anchors”: a place to exercise (gym, park, beach), a café with Wi‑Fi to work, a market for fresh produce, a daily walking route. Replicating this type of framework in France – whether you live in Paris, Lyon, Rennes, or a village – gives the brain a reassuring structure.
Creating a Home that Soothes Homesickness
Your housing has an enormous emotional weight. Even if your Parisian studio seems tiny compared to the family home, you can turn it into a nest.
Homesickness specialists recommend integrating “bridging objects” from your home country: printed photos (not just of loved ones, but also of places you love), a familiar blanket, a candle or scent that reminds you of a smell from home, a few books or DVDs in your native language. Some travelers never leave without a candle from a specific brand precisely to immediately recreate a sense of familiarity.
To feel better in an impersonal rental, like a long-term Airbnb, it is advisable to arrange it to your taste. This can include putting away or moving neutral objects, and adding personal touches like a soft lamp, a plant, a rug, or a photo frame. Opt for a photo that shows you in a moment of pride (graduation, solo trip) rather than nostalgic images, for a more positive impact.
Be careful of one pitfall, however: turning your French apartment into a closed sanctuary of your home country. The goal is to soothe you, not to cut you off from the outside world. The balance lies between familiar comfort at home and curiosity outside.
Eating for Comfort: Between French Cuisine and Flavors from Home
Your relationship with food is one of the most frequent triggers of homesickness. Eating differently, at different times, without access to certain staple foods can quickly become a source of stress.
The good news: France, and especially big cities, are full of international grocery stores. In Paris, for example, you can find:
| Type of products | Example store | Address / Arrondissement |
|---|---|---|
| American and North American products | Thanksgiving Grocery Store | 20 rue Saint‑Paul, 75004 |
| Various American products | The Real McCoy | 194 rue de Grenelle, 75007 |
| British specialties | Marks & Spencer (several stores) | e.g. 6 rue de la Pépinière, 75008 |
| Portuguese products | La Caravelle des Saveurs | Boulevard Saint‑Martin |
| Polish products | Comme en Pologne | 9 Rue Hégésippe Moreau, 75018 |
| Italian products | Latte Cisternino | 108 rue Saint‑Maur, 75011 |
These stores import very specific products, such as American cereals, US-style bacon, Polish dumplings, British teas, Asian sauces, or Mexican spices. Stores like La Grande Épicerie de Paris or frozen food chains like Picard also offer Indian, Japanese, Italian, or American dishes.
For people outside Paris, several options exist: specialized online stores deliver throughout France, often with hundreds of items and sometimes free shipping above a certain amount. Furthermore, some stores like Aldi, Carrefour, or E.Leclerc occasionally offer American products (peanut butter, cream cheese, ranch dressing) under different names.
To get used to French supermarkets, a few reference points help avoid feeling lost:
| Chain | Store type | Particularities useful for expats |
|---|---|---|
| Carrefour | From small Carrefour City to large hypermarket | Wide range, many store brands, sometimes a “world food” aisle |
| E.Leclerc | Mainly hypermarkets on the outskirts | Aggressive pricing, frequent “anti-inflation” promotions |
| Monoprix | Supermarket + decor/clothing store | Very urban, convenient but often more expensive |
| Auchan | Hyper and supermarkets | Wide choice, model close to large North American stores |
| Biocoop / Naturalia | Organic stores | Useful for gluten-free, vegan products, etc. |
Getting used to local practices (weighing your own fruits and vegetables, paying for bags, bringing your own shopping bag, looking for eggs at room temperature rather than in the fridge) turns every shopping trip into a small victory over the feeling of strangeness.
Finally, French cuisine itself can become a support. Preparing a quiche, ratatouille, or a simple pasta dish with regional cheese is also starting to create new positive memories here. Many expats find a balance by alternating recipes from their home country and local discoveries.
Advice for expatriates
Building Connections: Expat Networks and Local Encounters
Isolation is one of the fuels for homesickness. Conversely, a network – even a small one – of people to rely on changes everything. In France, the network of associations, expatriate groups, and local communities is extensive. In Paris, for example, you can find:
| Group type | Name / Organization | Particularity |
|---|---|---|
| Global expatriate network | InterNations Paris | Communities in 420 cities, monthly events |
| Expat social network | Expats Paris | Meetups, evening events, stand-up in English |
| International women’s groups | American Women’s Group, British and Commonwealth Women’s Association, Inspirelle | Coffee gatherings, book clubs, mutual aid |
| Expat parents | MessageParis | Over 50 events per month |
| Psychological help in English | SOS Help | Anonymous helpline |
| French language and culture | Alliance Française, WICE | Classes, language exchanges, lectures |
Outside Paris, communities also exist: “English Speakers in Lyon”, groups for English-speaking retirees, or circles of expats by nationality. Regions like the Dordogne, Brittany, Occitanie, or the Riviera are known for hosting many foreigners, with their clubs, choirs, charity associations, or sports teams.
Participating in these activities helps combat loneliness, provides practical advice (doctor, CAF, lease), allows sharing experiences with people in the same situation, and avoids relying solely on family as distant emotional support.
It can be tempting at first to only socialize with compatriots. However, those who end up truly feeling at home in France combine two circles: an expat network for emotional security and mutual aid, and connections with French people, which open the door to a finer understanding of the culture.
Using Language Exchanges to Step Out of Your Bubble
Learning French – even imperfectly – is one of the most powerful levers for reducing homesickness. Understanding a joke, following a conversation at the coffee machine, daring to call the town hall without anxiety: each step forward reinforces the feeling of control over your environment, at the heart of psychological models of culture shock.
Over 2 million members are registered on international language exchange platforms.
The principle is simple: you exchange half the time in your language, the other half in French. These meetings are often supplemented by other activities (outings, dancing, board games) which, in a way, download the local culture into your daily life.
Certain mobile apps – HelloTalk, Tandem, Speaky, Idyoma – also allow you to practice from home, via voice message or video call. For the more timid, starting online can be a gentle transition before diving into a language café in Paris, Lyon, or Toulouse.
Staying Close to Loved Ones Without Getting “Stuck” Back Home
Physical distance no longer prevents having a rich family life… provided you give it structure. There are many tools: video calls, instant messaging, emails, social media, paper letters, postcards.
The risk, during periods of homesickness, is twofold: either cutting off almost all contact to avoid the pain, or conversely, spending entire evenings scrolling through the social media of loved ones and comparing, which fuels frustration and nostalgia.
Finding a middle ground often involves clear organization:
To maintain the connection with distant family, it is advisable to set up regular appointments (like a weekly call with parents and another monthly one with grandparents) while considering time zones. Create a family group on a messaging app to easily share daily photos and anecdotes, without pressure for immediate replies. Vary communication formats: alternate between a long recap email, a simple voice message, or sending a postcard from a French village.
Some families even create rituals: a “Sunday movie” watched simultaneously in two countries, a remote book club, a game night via an online platform. These structured moments give the impression of continuing to build something together despite the distance.
Specialists in dispersed families emphasize one point: often, it is up to the person who has gone abroad to take the main initiative in maintaining contact, because they are the one who changed the balance. Accepting this as an integral part of the expatriation choice helps make it feel less like an injustice.
Making the Most of the French Pace of Life to Breathe Better
France is often cited as an example regarding work-life balance. The legal framework and customs invite, at least on paper, a life less obsessed with work than in some countries.
A few reference points:
| Aspect | France (general framework) | Possible impact on homesickness |
|---|---|---|
| Legal working hours | 35 hours per week | More theoretical time for leisure and integration |
| Paid leave | Minimum 5 weeks per year | Possibility to go home to see family or explore France |
| Right to disconnect | Companies with 50+ employees cannot require constant availability | Limits mental invasion of work |
| Lunch break | 1 hour common, sometimes 2–3 hours in the South | Real social time possible in the middle of the day |
| RTT (reduction of working time) | Extra days off for overtime | Margin to recover in case of psychological fatigue |
Of course, everything depends on the sector and position. Managers may work more hours, and not all companies apply the principles ideally. But overall, you have a solid legal basis to protect personal life spaces.
Getting involved in local activities (sports, theater, volunteering, hiking, choir) positively transforms the expatriate experience. Many French associations abroad are happy to welcome newcomers, even non-French speakers, provided they make an effort to participate regularly.
When Homesickness Affects Mental Health: Recognizing the Warning Threshold
Even if homesickness is normal, it can, for some people, tip over into deeper distress: depression, generalized anxiety, severe sleep disorders, excessive alcohol consumption, etc. Research on expatriates sent by their company to Western countries shows that this suffering has both personal (isolation, physical symptoms) and professional (decreased performance, questioning of the project) consequences.
It’s time to seek professional help if you notice, over several weeks: persistent symptoms that affect your daily life, increased social isolation, significant mood changes, or self-destructive behaviors.
Near-constant sadness or anxiety, a general loss of interest, significant sleep disturbances, marked weight changes, social isolation, and thoughts of despair or self-destruction are signs to take seriously.
In France, the mental health system is dense but sometimes difficult to navigate, especially for a foreigner. A few reference points can simplify the task for you.
Seeking Help in France: How the System Works
The first recommended step, as advised by health authorities, is to see a general practitioner, the médecin traitant. Even if they are not a psychology specialist, they can assess the situation, propose initial treatment if needed, and most importantly, refer you to the right channel (psychiatrist, psychologist, public structures).
Then, several options exist:
Psychologists and the “Mon Soutien Psy” Program
Since 2022, a national program allows for partial reimbursement of psychology sessions for mild to moderate disorders (anxiety, depression, adaptation difficulties, etc.). It is open from age 3 and works as follows:
– The doctor provides a referral letter.
– You choose a psychologist registered in the official program directory.
– The first session (assessment) is billed at €40, subsequent ones at €30.
– The Health Insurance reimburses 60% of the cost, and supplementary insurance may cover the rest.
This is the cost, in euros, of a private practice psychology session, depending on the city and type of therapy.
Psychiatry and Public Structures
Medico-psychological centers (CMP) attached to public hospitals offer free care, with multidisciplinary teams (psychiatrists, psychologists, nurses, social workers). They are organized by geographic sector: each address is assigned to a reference CMP.
Wait times can be long, but these centers are particularly useful if the distress goes beyond simple nostalgia (severe disorders, suicidal risks, previously diagnosed conditions).
For specific situations, other structures exist:
Several programs exist to support people with psychological difficulties, depending on their age and specific situation.
Centers specialized in welcoming, listening to, and treating people facing addictions (alcohol, drugs, gambling…).
Medico-psycho-pedagogical centers offering multidisciplinary follow-up for children and adolescents with psychological difficulties or school problems.
University psychological support offices offering students psychology consultations fully covered by health insurance.
Services in English and Helplines
For those who prefer to speak in a language other than French, several options have developed: directories of English-speaking psychologists and therapists, private centers specializing in supporting foreigners, video consultations.
In parallel, anonymous helplines can be a first recourse: in English, an association like SOS Help offers daily listening hours. In French, national numbers offer support in case of crisis, including a 24/7 emergency call line for suicidal risks.
In case of immediate danger, the instruction remains the same for everyone: go to the nearest hospital emergency room or dial the emergency numbers (112 or 15).
Adjusting Your Relationship with Social Media
Social media plays an ambivalent role in the experience of homesickness. They allow you to follow the lives of loved ones, share your discoveries, and stay in touch with news from your home country. But scrolling for hours through photos of family gatherings, weddings, national holidays can also rekindle the pain of “not being there.”
Expatriation specialists therefore recommend a conscious approach:
Strategies to transform your social media use into a lever for active integration in France, avoiding the pitfall of passive nostalgia.
Limit aimless browsing sessions by scheduling dedicated time slots and turning off non-essential notifications to regain control.
Prioritize expat groups in France, pages for your city, and accounts about integration rather than purely nostalgic content from your home country.
Move from passive consumption to active exchange: use voice messages and engage in one-on-one conversations to create connections.
Keeping a journal, paper or digital, is another powerful tool. Students on mobility abroad emphasize that recording your emotions, successes, and struggles helps gain perspective, track your progress, and remember that you are already overcoming a lot.
Helping Children Manage Their Own Homesickness
If you have children, they may be experiencing their own version of culture shock, sometimes more discreetly. Differences in how holidays (Christmas, birthdays) are celebrated, school cafeteria meals, the language at school, all of this can unsettle them.
Specialists in expatriate parenting emphasize three points:
To facilitate children’s adaptation during expatriation, it is advisable to preserve familiar reference points like their favorite toys or books. It is also important to avoid constantly expressing your own frustrations about the host country in front of them, to avoid transmitting a global rejection. In case of difficulties, collaboration with the school (nurses, school psychologists) can lead to referrals to appropriate support structures.
Networks of expat parents, especially in large cities, organize meetups, coffee gatherings, playgroups. They offer a space where children can hear their native language and parents can exchange advice and reassurance.
Accepting Not to Like Everything, All the Time
A frequent trap of homesickness is falling into constant and sterile comparison: “Back home, this is better, here it’s terrible,” or the opposite. Culture shock models emphasize the need to move from a judgment of “better/worse” to a view of “different.”
Settling in France involves appreciating some aspects while criticizing others, like bureaucracy or professional practices. The key is to place them within the context of a different social organization, which reduces their emotional weight.
In interviews with expatriates from Asia, the Middle East, or Sub-Saharan Africa who came to work in Western Europe, many recount that they started feeling better the day they stopped expecting their host country to behave “like back home.” They were then able to better enjoy what France truly offers: a strong healthcare system, a real place for family in labor law, a rich cultural life, long vacations, attention paid to childhood.
Giving Yourself a Deadline… and the Right to Change Your Mind
For some, despite all efforts, expatriation remains a daily struggle. Specialists on the subject encourage setting an honest time horizon: give yourself six to twelve months to truly test life in France, actively engaging in integration (learning the language, building connections, exploring the country), while keeping in mind that it will always be possible to reassess the situation.
Deciding to return home after a period abroad is not a failure, but an acknowledgment of one’s needs and priorities. Conversely, the most difficult moments often precede a positive turning point, like making real friends, successfully completing a professional project, or participating in a local celebration.
Homesickness doesn’t necessarily disappear completely. It often transforms into a form of gentle nostalgia, coexisting with a real attachment to France. Living between two cultures means accepting having a heart that’s a little expanded… and sometimes a little torn. Over time, this pull often becomes a richness more than a pain.
In Summary: Tame, Don’t Fight
Managing homesickness in France is not about trying to crush it, but to tame it. This involves:
To facilitate your adaptation in France, it is important to understand that culture shock is common. Structure your daily life with routines, arrange your housing into a comforting nest, and vary your diet between familiar dishes and discoveries. Build connections with other expatriates and French people, learn the language, and gradually participate in local life. Maintain balanced contact with your loved ones, use the advantages of the French system (healthcare, free time), and be attentive to warning signs to seek professional help if needed. Give yourself the right to have doubts and adjust your project.
Homesickness is part of the emotional price of a life abroad. But with reference points, people to rely on, and a good knowledge of available resources, it stops being an abyss and becomes a sometimes noisy, but manageable, companion on the path of your life in France.
A 62-year-old retiree, with a financial estate of over one million euros, well structured in Europe, wanted to change his tax residence to optimize his tax burden and diversify his investments, while maintaining a close link with France. Budget allocated: 10,000 euros for comprehensive support (tax advice, administrative formalities, relocation, and estate structuring), without forced sale of assets.
After analyzing several attractive destinations (Portugal, Spain, Italy, Belgium), the chosen strategy consisted of returning to settle in France while optimizing the use of existing schemes (tax treaties, PEA, life insurance, impatriate regime if applicable, usufruct/naked ownership). The mission included: pre-residence change tax audit (exit tax, tax deferrals), choice of region with high quality of life/cost ratio (e.g., province vs Paris), securing French tax resident status, coordination with CNAV/CPAM, bank residence transfer, plan to manage double taxation risks, introduction to a local network (notary, tax lawyer, wealth manager), and overall estate integration. This type of support aligns returning to France with a sustainable estate strategy.
Planning to move abroad? Contact us for custom offers.
Disclaimer: The information provided on this website is for informational purposes only and does not constitute financial, legal, or professional advice. We encourage you to consult qualified experts before making any investment, real estate, or expatriation decisions. Although we strive to maintain up-to-date and accurate information, we do not guarantee the completeness, accuracy, or timeliness of the proposed content. As investment and expatriation involve risks, we disclaim any liability for potential losses or damages arising from the use of this site. Your use of this site confirms your acceptance of these terms and your understanding of the associated risks.
Cyril Jarnias is an independent expert in international wealth management with over 20 years of experience. As an expatriate himself, he is dedicated to helping individuals and business leaders build, protect, and pass on their wealth with complete peace of mind.
On his website, cyriljarnias.com, he shares his expertise on international real estate, offshore company formation, and expatriation.
Thanks to his expertise, he offers sound advice to optimize his clients' wealth management. Cyril Jarnias is also recognized for his appearances in many prestigious media outlets such as BFM Business, les Français de l’étranger, Le Figaro, Les Echos, and Mieux vivre votre argent, where he shares his knowledge and know-how in wealth management.
