Published on and written by Cyril Jarnias
Moving to Germany, whether to study, work, or join a partner, is often a heady mix of excitement and vertigo. A new country, a new language, new rules of the game… and after a few weeks, an uninvited guest crashes the party: homesickness, that famous Heimweh the Germans talk about.
Up to 70% of people who move abroad go through a phase of homesickness.
This article offers a very concrete overview – with no sugarcoating – of what truly helps navigate this period, drawing on academic research, mental health data, and testimonies from expats who have lived in Germany for years.
Understanding Homesickness to Better Defuse It
Homesickness is not a whim nor a character weakness. Psychologists define it as a form of stress or anxiety related to separation from one’s familiar environment: family, friends, routines, language, food, even the light or background noises.
Research identifies recurring emotional and physical symptoms. In Germany, these symptoms are often amplified by the language barrier, a very direct communication style, and a highly structured daily life, which can be the opposite of habits from one’s home country.
Here is how studies summarize the main effects of homesickness on people living abroad:
| Aspect | Research Findings |
|---|---|
| Prevalence | 7 out of 10 students report missing their home country after moving abroad |
| Expatriates | 20 to 90% report homesickness in the first year |
| Mental Health | Strong correlation with depression and anxiety |
| Sleep | 63% of affected individuals report significant sleep disturbances |
| Overall Stress | 40% of new international arrivals report high stress impacting their productivity |
| Cultural Adaptation | Cultural disconnection slows adaptation by approximately 30% |
What is often called the “adaptation curve” generally follows several phases: a 1 to 2-month honeymoon, then a culture shock that can last 6 to 12 months, before a phase of gradual adjustment. Many say it takes nearly two years to truly feel “at home” in Germany. Remembering this timeline helps avoid panicking at the first bout of blues.
Recognizing the Signals Before They Settle In
The trap of homesickness in Germany is that it can initially seem like “simple fatigue“: you’re exhausted by paperwork, appointments at the Ausländerbehörde (Foreigners’ Office), apartment hunting, the new language, your job, or studies. However, letting these signals persist increases the risk of depression.
Studies identify a cluster of typical symptoms:
| Type of Symptoms | Common Examples Among Expats in Germany |
|---|---|
| Emotional | Sadness, nostalgia, irritability, anxiety, urge to flee, feeling “out of place” |
| Relational | Isolation, difficulty connecting, tensions with the partner or family back home |
| Physical | Sleep disturbances, persistent fatigue, headaches, changes in appetite, low energy |
| Cognitive | Difficulty concentrating, rumination, idealizing the home country, self-deprecation |
| Functional | Decreased performance at work or university, procrastination, repeated mistakes |
A study cited in a human resources management journal notes, for example, that homesickness among expatriates can lead to professional errors, delays, customer complaints, and lower team morale. In other words, what you’re feeling isn’t just “in your head”; it ends up impacting daily life.
Being able to name what you’re experiencing is an essential first step: you are neither “too sensitive” nor “not strong enough,” you are going through a documented, frequent phenomenon for which effective strategies exist.
Personal Development Tip
Culture Shock German-Style: Why Adaptation Can Sting
To manage homesickness in Germany, you must also understand what, in the local culture, can intensify or prolong this discomfort. Germany indeed combines several cultural traits that unsettle many foreigners, especially in big cities.
Punctuality is sacred, order and rules are omnipresent, communication is direct, social circles sometimes seem closed, and quiet Sundays can turn a simple weekend into a long tunnel of solitude for newcomers.
Several surveys among expats illustrate this gap:
| Indicator (expat surveys) | Germany’s Position |
|---|---|
| Ease of settling in / welcome | 50th out of 53 countries in a major international survey |
| Friendliness towards foreigners | 30% of expats find locals somewhat unfriendly towards foreigners |
| Difficulty making local friends | 55% struggle with this, versus a 36% global average |
| Feeling of lacking a support network | 32% (vs. 24% average) |
| Difficulty living without speaking German | 50% find it difficult (vs. 32% globally) |
Add to this everyday peculiarities that, taken together, can fuel a feeling of permanent disconnect: shops closed on Sundays, the importance of cash while many expats come from highly digitized countries, heavy bureaucracy for registering, getting an Anmeldung (registration), health insurance, a bank account…
Although the local rules (respect for free time, employee protection, culture of reliability) have a coherent internal logic, for someone suffering from homesickness, they can represent a series of cumulative ‘little hassles’ that are hard to bear.
The good news is that by understanding these codes rather than enduring them, you quickly move away from the feeling of helplessness – and this significantly reduces the ground on which homesickness thrives.
Breaking Out of Social Isolation: Top Priority
Research shows that expats who engage in clubs or associations adapt up to 50% faster. Conversely, staying confined to your apartment, office, and daily video calls with your home country prolongs adaptation by about 25%.
This is where adult reality works against you: unlike school or university where socialization frameworks are built-in, adult life abroad requires a much more active approach.
Several strategies stand out as particularly effective in Germany.
Finding Your “Third Place”
Psychologists talk about the “third place” to designate a space that is neither your home nor your work/studies, but where you go regularly, where people start to recognize you, where bonds form slowly.
In Germany, this can be a Sportverein (sports club), a dance class, a climbing gym, a library, a neighborhood café, a Sprachcafé organized by the Stadtbibliothek (city library), or a creative workshop.
Expatriates have managed to build a circle of friends through regular activities. In Augsburg, weekly visits to a basketball court allowed one of them to create a real group of friends. In Mannheim, another person, who arrived alone, used their bouldering gym, dance classes, and the Bumble BFF app as main springboards to meet people and integrate socially.
The central idea is to increase the famous “mere-exposure effect”: the more you see the same people in a regular setting, the more conversations become natural, and the more the feeling of loneliness recedes.
Relying on Expat Communities… Without Getting Stuck in Them
Germany is home to a dense network of expatriate groups, both online and offline. Platforms like InterNations (present in 28 German cities), Meetup, or a myriad of Facebook and WhatsApp groups (“Expats in Berlin,” “Munich Expats,” “Hamburg Expats,” etc.) regularly organize activities: hikes, game nights, outings to Biergärten, visits to Christmas markets.
Join expat groups to share your experience and build connections in your new city.
Meet people who intimately understand what you’re going through, reducing the feeling of being isolated in your difficulties.
As reported by groups like Stuttgart Expats or Düsseldorf Expat Meetup, these events can literally transform your perception of the city.
But research on cultural adaptation highlights a risk: locking yourself into an “expat bubble” can hinder your long-term integration. The challenge is therefore to find a balance: using these networks to create an initial social safety net, while keeping doors open to the local language and culture.
Engaging with German Associations and Clubs
Germany is the country of Vereine (associations). There are tens of thousands: sports clubs, music clubs, gardening clubs, theater groups, charitable associations, choirs… Over 24 million people are members of a sports club, for example.
This is an excellent antidote to homesickness, for several reasons: meetings are regular (which strengthens the sense of belonging), Germans are generally more relaxed there than in a purely professional setting, and you immediately share a common interest, which serves as a conversation starter.
Volunteering (Ehrenamt) is also highly valued and can open as many social as professional doors, while helping you feel useful – a key factor against the feeling of emptiness often associated with homesickness.
Building Reassuring Routines in a New Environment
Research on cultural adaptation shows that a structured routine can reduce stress by up to 40% during major life transitions. Yet, when you arrive in Germany, all routines explode: schedules, meals, transportation, language, administrative procedures…
Quickly recreating personal rituals is therefore a very effective strategy for pushing back homesickness.
To facilitate your integration in Germany, it’s beneficial to establish daily or weekly routines. This can include getting up at a fixed time, having breakfast at a specific café every Monday, regularly going for a run or walk in the same park, or setting aside a weekly slot for shopping at the local market. The country, with its culture of stability and excellent public transport network, lends itself particularly well to adopting these structuring habits.
Your housing also plays a key role. Studies show that personalizing your environment reduces adaptation stress by up to 38%. Putting up photos, bringing a few cherished objects, adding a blanket, soft lights, a familiar scent, all this helps your brain register: “here, too, is home.”
Many long-term expats in Germany emphasize this point: the day they stopped seeing their apartment as a temporary hotel room and started treating it as a real “home,” their homesickness began to decrease.
The Relationship with Your Home Country: Staying Connected… Without Getting Stuck in the Past
Contrary to what one might think, calling your family for an hour every day is not necessarily the best idea for fighting homesickness. One study even indicates that prolonged daily contact with the home country can worsen adjustment by about 25%.
The challenge is to find a balance between two extremes: a brutal cut-off (which can be very destabilizing) and hyper-connection (which prevents you from fully investing in your new life).
A strategy often recommended is to schedule regular calls, for example three times a week, at a fixed time, using tools like WhatsApp, Signal, Messenger, Facetime, or Google Meet. Knowing you’ll talk to your loved ones on a specific day, at a specific time, reduces the anxiety of “missing” something, while freeing up mental time for your activities in Germany.
The use of social media also deserves real reflection: scrolling for a long time on Instagram or TikTok, seeing your friends live “normally” in your country, can amplify FOMO (Fear Of Missing Out) and negative comparison. Many expats find that voluntarily reducing their time on these platforms noticeably improves their mood.
Conversely, some digital tools can become allies to soothe homesickness: shared photo albums with family, postcards sent via online services, synchronized movie nights using Teleparty, online games across continents, remote cooking classes where you prepare the same recipe as your parents in real time…
The essential thing is that these connections nurture your feeling of support, without freezing you in permanent nostalgia.
Food as a Bridge Between Two Worlds
Few things trigger homesickness as violently as food. The lack of a simple dish – a dhal, a curry, a particular cake, an unfindable sauce – can suddenly crystallize all the nostalgia for a country.
On this front, Germany offers both frustrations (some products are unfindable) and great resources, especially in big cities: Asian supermarkets, Turkish shops, “world” aisles in major chains, specialized markets.
A dense network of grocery stores and online shops now delivers across the country. You can find essential food items like stone-ground whole wheat flour for rotis, traditional spice mixes (rajma masala, pav bhaji masala, kitchen king…), fresh idli and dosa batters, tea-time snacks, and authentic chai blends. Some shops also offer cultural products, such as puja kits or assortments for Diwali.
More generally, German culinary diversity can also become a field of exploration that alleviates homesickness rather than feeding it. The historical presence of Italian and Turkish cuisine, the proliferation of Asian, African, or Latin American restaurants, the rise of vegetarianism and veganism, all offer a much richer gastronomic landscape than the caricatured “sauerkraut-sausage” image.
Discovering these cuisines without renouncing your own allows you to transform frustration into curiosity, which has a direct impact on the feeling of well-being.
Taming German Culture Rather Than Clashing With It
A significant part of homesickness comes from the feeling of “not understanding anything” about local codes. Here, German culture has a reputation for being demanding: strong emphasis on punctuality, strict respect for quiet hours, Sunday closures, obsession with waste sorting, formal language (Sie) to handle with tact…
For expatriates, understanding certain local norms—like punctuality being seen as respect, a direct ‘no’ perceived as a quest for clarity rather than an attack, or quiet Sundays as a societal choice—allows you to no longer experience them as aggressions and transforms your perception.
Learning German plays a decisive role here. Surveys show that 50% of expats find it very difficult to live in Germany without speaking the language, and 60% consider this language difficult to learn. Yet, reaching even an intermediate level (like B1) profoundly changes the daily experience: more autonomy in procedures, easier access to the local job market, more authentic relationships with neighbors, understanding of humor and implications.
Incidentally, this mechanically reduces homesickness, because you are no longer “just passing through”; you gradually become a full-fledged actor in the society that is hosting you.
When Homesickness Spills Over into Mental Health: Seeking Help in Germany
Despite all the good practices, homesickness can sometimes reach a magnitude that approaches a depressive or anxiety disorder. Research emphasizes that prolonged symptoms of Heimweh can evolve into full-blown depression: persistent sadness, loss of interest, feeling of emptiness, dark thoughts, inability to function normally.
In these cases, seeking professional help in Germany is neither exaggerated nor premature; on the contrary, it is a protective reflex.
How Accessing Psychological Care Works in Practice
Germany has a mental health system that is quite comprehensive, integrated into the standard healthcare system. Health insurance is mandatory for anyone legally residing in the country, and about 90% of residents are covered by a public health fund (gesetzliche Krankenkasse).
For psychotherapy sessions to be covered by public insurance, it is generally required:
1. that a recognized disorder (depression, anxiety disorder, PTSD, etc.) be diagnosed;
2. that the therapist has authorization to bill public insurance (Kassenzulassung).
The process begins with one or more assessment sessions (psychotherapeutische Sprechstunde), intended to establish a diagnosis and define a treatment strategy. These initial sessions are covered by health insurance.
The downside is the length of waiting lists, especially in large cities: the waiting period can range from a few weeks to several months. However, a recent measure requires therapists to keep a weekly quota of minutes dedicated to psychological “emergencies.”
Official Resources and Useful Entry Points
Several entry points exist to start this process without speaking perfect German:
– the general practitioner (Hausarzt), who can do an initial assessment, rule out medical causes, and refer you to a specialist;
– the national hotline 116 117, which helps get an assessment appointment within a theoretically reasonable timeframe;
– online directories like Therapie.de, portals of regional doctors’ associations (Kassenärztliche Vereinigung), Jameda, or Doctolib, where you can filter by language, specialty, and type of insurance;
– specialized online services for expats, offering therapy via video conference in different languages, sometimes not reimbursed but faster to access.
The fee for a 50-minute session with a private therapist in Germany is often between 100 and 160 euros.
In Case of Acute Crisis
If homesickness turns into a crisis – suicidal thoughts, inability to get out of bed, repeated panic attacks – it is crucial not to stay alone. Germany has several emergency resources:
– 112 (emergency number for ambulance and life-threatening emergencies);
– 110 (police);
– anonymous and free helplines like TelefonSeelsorge (0800 111 0 111 or 0800 111 0 222), accessible 24/7, also with chat and email options;
– local crisis services like the Berliner Krisendienst, reachable by phone 24/7, with physical drop-in centers in the evening.
Knowing these resources exist – even if you hope never to need them – often provides a certain sense of security, which already lightens the mental load a little.
Leveraging Germany’s Specific Resources to Feel Better
An interesting paradox emerges from major expat surveys: if Germany ranks poorly on welcome and administrative ease, it ranks high for safety, the job market, economic stability, the healthcare system, and overall quality of life.
In other words, the backdrop against which you experience homesickness is objectively rather favorable for building something lasting, provided you manage to get through this initial phase.
Several elements can become levers:
The country offers a strong job market with a very low unemployment rate and high average salaries. The social protection system covers health insurance, psychological care, sick leave, and family benefits. The culture prioritizes work-life balance (Feierabend, quiet Sundays, generous vacations), improving well-being. A dense network of parks, forests, bike paths, and sports clubs allows you to stay active. Finally, well-established foreign communities organize many cultural and associative events.
Turning these abstract assets into concrete resources against homesickness often requires a slight shift in perspective: moving from “everything is complicated here” to “I have a relatively stable foundation to lean on while I go through this difficult period.”
Adjusting Your Mindset: From Regret to Building
Studies on expat resilience show a constant element: 78% of those who strive to “reframe” their difficulties, that is, to give them a broader meaning (learning, personal development, proof of courage), report strengthened confidence in the following year.
This does not mean forcing yourself to be positive or denying your suffering. It is more about accepting homesickness as a logical consequence of having strong attachments elsewhere, and reminding yourself that this feeling, however brutal, is not permanent.
Testimonies from expatriates long settled in Germany highlight several particularly useful avenues for facilitating integration and daily life.
– give yourself permission to not be okay, without comparing yourself to others;
– stop asking yourself every day if leaving was a mistake, and focus on concrete three- or six-month goals (mastering a certain aspect of German, making a local friend, joining a club, understanding an aspect of the culture…);
– keep the adaptation curve in mind: the overwhelm you feel now is a phase, not a fate;
– remember that many before you have gone through these same lonely evenings in an anonymous apartment, before building a circle of friends, or even a family, in Germany.
People who arrived in Germany speaking neither the language nor having a network report that it took them about two years to feel truly comfortable. Others, who joined a partner based on an emotional decision, initially experienced strong homesickness, but noted, a few years later, that they no longer considered leaving the country.
When Leaving Remains a Legitimate Option
It would be dishonest to claim that everyone ends up thriving in Germany through sheer willpower. Some people, despite all their efforts, find that the emotional cost is too high, that their mental health is deteriorating, or that their priorities have evolved.
Deciding to return to your home country should not be perceived as a failure. This return, sometimes called “repatriation shock” or “reverse culture shock,” can be a delicate transition, but it is often the most self-respecting decision.
The important nuance is to not make this decision solely at the peak of homesickness, in a moment of despair, but after having tried various strategies, possibly with the help of a professional who knows the dynamics of expatriation.
In Summary: What Really Helps You Through Homesickness in Germany
Homesickness in Germany is a complex mix of nostalgia, culture shock, administrative fatigue, and socially organized loneliness (friendship circles, very loyal, often form slowly). However, data and testimonies converge on several concrete levers:
To facilitate your integration in Germany, it is advisable to quickly recreate routines and a familiar framework. Establish a healthy balance between contact with your home country and investment in local life. Use food, rituals, and familiar objects as bridges to the new culture, not as exclusive refuges. Leverage expat networks while avoiding cutting yourself off from Germans. Actively tame local cultural codes, like punctuality, direct communication, quiet Sundays, and the use of “Sie” and “du”. Learn German to at least a conversational level to reduce dependency and feelings of exclusion. Finally, monitor your mental state and don’t hesitate to use the health resources available in Germany in case of persistent symptoms.
Experiencing homesickness in Germany does not mean you made the wrong choice, nor that you are “not cut out” for expatriation. It simply means you are human, attached to what and whom you left behind, and facing a transition that most studies describe as one of the most demanding in a lifetime.
With time, adapted strategies, and possibly external support, this Heimweh tightening your throat today can become, tomorrow, the discreet background of a rich life, shared between several worlds – of which Germany may, perhaps, become a permanent part.
A 62-year-old retiree, with a financial portfolio exceeding one million euros well-structured in Europe, wanted to change his tax residence to optimize his tax burden and diversify his investments, while maintaining a link with France. Budget allocated: 10,000 euros for comprehensive support (tax advice, administrative formalities, relocation and wealth structuring), without forced asset sales.
After analyzing several attractive destinations (Germany, Greece, Cyprus, Mauritius), the chosen strategy was to target Germany for its stable taxation, its robust social protection, its extensive network of tax treaties and its strong legal security, with a high cost of living but offset by a high quality of services (health, infrastructure, transport). The mission included: a pre-expatriation tax audit (exit tax or not, tax deferral), obtaining residence with rental/purchase of a primary residence, coordinating CNAS/CPAM and German health insurance, transferring bank residence, planning the severance of French tax ties, connecting with a local network (lawyer, Steuerberater (tax advisor), bilingual support) and wealth integration (analysis and restructuring if necessary).
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Cyril Jarnias is an independent expert in international wealth management with over 20 years of experience. As an expatriate himself, he is dedicated to helping individuals and business leaders build, protect, and pass on their wealth with complete peace of mind.
On his website, cyriljarnias.com, he shares his expertise on international real estate, offshore company formation, and expatriation.
Thanks to his expertise, he offers sound advice to optimize his clients' wealth management. Cyril Jarnias is also recognized for his appearances in many prestigious media outlets such as BFM Business, les Français de l’étranger, Le Figaro, Les Echos, and Mieux vivre votre argent, where he shares his knowledge and know-how in wealth management.
