Published on and written by Cyril Jarnias
Moving to Cambodia isn’t just about a change in climate or time zone. It’s about entering a social universe where hierarchy structures relationships, where a smile often serves as an emotional lightning rod, where family comes before the individual, and where religion permeates the calendar, values, and even the way of doing business. For a future expatriate, understanding these codes is not a luxury: it’s the condition for successful integration, both at work and in daily life.
Understanding the Cultural Foundation: Hierarchy, “Face,” and Collective Spirit
Cambodia operates on a logic very different from individualistic and egalitarian Western societies. Relationships are deeply hierarchical, strongly collective, and marked by the notion of “face.”
The hierarchy is based on age, social status, professional position, and sometimes wealth or religious piety. The Khmer language itself reflects this organization: there is no neutral “you,” and verbs change according to the rank of the person being spoken about. In almost every interaction, the goal is to identify “who is above, who is below” in order to adapt one’s attitude, vocabulary, and even posture.
Society favors the collective (family, team, community, country) over the individual. Decisions are evaluated based on their collective impact rather than personal impact. In business, employees often value a supportive, family-like atmosphere where group cohesion takes precedence over spectacular individual performance.
The third key is the notion of “face” (called moek in Khmer): preserving each person’s dignity, reputation, and honor. Causing someone to lose face—through public criticism, humiliation, or anger—is one of the worst social faux pas. Therefore, direct confrontation is avoided, preferring softened language, hints, and silence.
For an expatriate accustomed to frankness, these three pillars—hierarchy, collective, face—explain a large part of the cultural gaps encountered, especially at work.
“Saving Face” in Daily Life
The culture of face isn’t limited to important meetings. It permeates the most everyday gestures. A coworker who doesn’t understand an instruction will hesitate to ask questions for fear of appearing incompetent. A “yes” can mean: “I understand,” “I hear you,” or “I prefer not to say no,” but not necessarily “I agree” in the Western sense.
In a social context, actions are sometimes undertaken mainly to avoid public embarrassment. For instance, in a restaurant, a person might pay the bill for the entire group to avoid the awkwardness of visibly splitting money in front of the staff. Similarly, in a family setting, important decisions, such as quickly organizing the wedding of a daughter who has eloped with her boyfriend, can be motivated by the desire to avoid a scandal and preserve the family’s reputation.
For a foreigner, the golden rule is to avoid anything that resembles a public failure: reprimands in an open-plan office, raising one’s voice, biting irony. Corrections should be made in private, with tact, first highlighting positive points, then slipping in possible improvements. The person must be able to “exit the situation gracefully.”
Communication: The Art of the Unspoken and Subtle Signals
Communication in Cambodia is said to be “high-context”: a large part of the message is conveyed through tone, silence, facial expression, and the situation, more than through the words themselves. Cambodians favor indirect, soft, non-confrontational speech.
A refusal will take the form of “we will think about it,” “that will be difficult,” “let’s see later” rather than a categorical “no.” Similarly, expressing disagreement with a superior is done through cautious paraphrases: “perhaps another option would be…,” “I’m not entirely sure….”
A smile can express joy, but also discomfort, unease, embarrassment, or an attempt to appease. Systematically interpreting it as lightheartedness or enthusiasm is a frequent misunderstanding, especially for newcomers.
Silence, for its part, is not automatically synonymous with agreement or indifference. It can express reflection, polite disagreement, or simply discomfort with the subject. During a meeting, a silent room does not mean everyone approves of the plan.
To adapt, an expatriate should slow their speech pace, leave pauses, carefully observe nonverbal reactions, and ask open-ended questions that allow interlocutors to express reservations without putting themselves at risk.
Gestures, Body, and Space: What Absolutely Not to Do
The relationship with the body follows specific codes. The head is considered the most sacred part of the body. Touching or patting the head of an adult or a child—an affectionate gesture in some cultures—is seen as a serious impoliteness.
Conversely, feet are considered impure. Pointing the soles of your feet toward a person, a Buddha image, or religious objects is very poorly regarded. Sitting with legs stretched out toward others, or slouched with feet on a chair or table, is considered a blatant lack of respect.
When sitting in a temple or at someone’s house, adopt the traditional posture by folding your legs to the side, with feet pointed backward. Furthermore, it is essential to consistently remove your shoes when entering a house, certain offices, and all places of worship. This gesture is a marker of respect and esteem for the owner or the place.
Interpersonal distance is generally respected: people maintain about one meter between each other, or even more in a formal context. Hugging, embracing, or cheek-kissing are not part of common practice—especially between men and women. Public displays of affection (kissing, long embraces) are considered inappropriate, even if young urbanites tend to relax these rules a bit.
Finally, to call someone, it’s better to use a hand extended palm down, wiggling the fingers toward yourself. Pointing with the finger palm up can be taken as an aggressive gesture.
Greeting, Introducing Yourself, Using the Right Titles
The traditional greeting, called Sampeah or Som Pas, consists of joining the hands in a prayer-like gesture in front of the chest and slightly bowing the head. The higher the hands go (up to the forehead) and the more marked the bow, the greater the respect: the most pronounced gestures are reserved for monks, very high-ranking dignitaries, or elders.
Not returning a Sampeah is considered very impolite. In a professional context or with foreigners, handshakes are common, especially between men. With a woman, it’s better to wait for her to initiate the handshake; many Cambodian women, particularly older ones, prefer to keep the Sampeah.
Forms of address are fundamental. In a formal context, Lok (Mr.) or Lok Srey / Lok Chumteav (Mrs./Ms.) are used, followed by the first name or full name. Using only the last name can be offensive, as it is often considered the name of an ancestor.
In Cambodia, it is common to use family-based titles as marks of respect in daily life. Terms such as *Ta* (grandfather), *Yeay* (grandmother), *Po* (uncle), *Ming* (aunt), *Bang* (older brother) or *Bang Srey* (older sister) are employed. These titles can also be used with strangers, for example at the market or on the street, based on their apparent age. This practice helps create an atmosphere of respectful closeness.
In the corporate world, professional titles complete this landscape. It’s common to address a manager by their title followed by their first name: Lok Oknha + first name for a major business leader, Ekudom + first name for a high-ranking official, etc. On business cards, clearly stating your position and possibly including a side in Khmer greatly facilitates initial contacts.
Family, Pillar of Society… and Work
In Cambodia, the nuclear family—parents and unmarried children—forms the central unit. But in practice, households are often extended: grandparents, married children and their spouses, grandchildren frequently live together. Three generations under one roof is not exceptional.
Kinship ties structure economic mutual aid, childcare, and decision-making. The husband is, in principle, the head of the family, expected to provide shelter and food. The wife often manages the budget, daily organization, and the moral and religious education of the children. Elders gain a high status over time and are almost never placed in nursing homes.
Historically, beyond biological kinship, symbolic ties like adoption or blood brotherhood served to consolidate social alliances. Today, this logic persists in the form of patronage relationships, where an individual (the client) seeks the protection and recommendations of a patron, in exchange for their loyalty and services.
Transposed to the business world, this pattern explains why many employees expect from a manager a quasi-paternal attitude: protection, advice, sometimes help in personal life. In return, they show loyalty, are not inclined to openly contradict this superior, even in case of disagreement.
This model even influences career choices: sacrificing a personal project to financially help the family is common. The expatriate who ignores this dimension risks judging certain professional choices too quickly as “irrational.”
Religion, Temples, and Festivals: A Calendar Structuring Life
The dominant religion is Theravada Buddhism, professed by over 90% of the population. It’s not just about individual beliefs: it’s a cultural framework organizing time, rites of passage, the way of conceiving destiny, and social hierarchy.
The temple—the wat—is the heart of the community: a place of prayer, but also of teaching, festivals, and social mediation. Monks are respected figures, sought as advisors, educators, sometimes healers or astrologers.
How to Behave in a Temple
For an expatriate, the temple is an unavoidable destination, whether as a visitor or during family ceremonies. There are a few basic rules to respect.
It is customary to remove your shoes at the entrance. Dress should be modest: shoulders and knees covered, no tank tops or mini-shorts. Men should avoid being shirtless, and women should wear loose-fitting clothing, no short skirts or low necklines. It is also recommended to avoid overly flashy clothing or excessive perfume.
Inside, people sit on the floor with legs folded, feet pointing backward or to the side, never pointed toward statues or monks. Monks are often seated on a higher platform. It is inappropriate to stand while they are seated; one should seek a lower posture as a sign of humility.
A crucial point: women must not touch a monk. If they need to hand him an object, they place it in front of him or give it via a man. Photos are allowed in many wats, but always ask for permission, especially when photographing monks or devotees in prayer. Standing in front of a large Buddha for an ostentatious selfie is considered disrespectful.
The Calendar of Major Festivals
Cambodia has a very high number of public holidays, around twenty per year. Most are related to Buddhism or the monarchy. For an expatriate, knowing the main festivals is essential, if only to anticipate administrative closures and slowdowns in activity.
Here is a simplified overview of some key days, noting that the exact dates for some Buddhist festivals vary according to the lunar calendar. The examples below refer to a typical recent year.
| Festival / Public Holiday | Usual Period | Major Cultural Particularities |
|---|---|---|
| International New Year | January 1 | Mainly a modern, urban celebration, popular with youth and expatriates |
| Victory Over the Khmer Rouge Regime | January 7 | Commemoration of the regime’s fall, official ceremonies in Phnom Penh |
| International Women’s Day | March 8 | Opportunity to celebrate women, gifts and events in many organizations |
| Khmer New Year (Chaul Chnam Thmey) | mid-April (3 days) | Major festival: temple visits, house cleaning, traditional games, symbolic water |
| Labor Day | May 1 | Day off, sometimes demonstrations in cities |
| Visak Bochea | late May (variable date) | Celebrates Buddha’s birth, enlightenment, and death, candle processions |
| Royal Ploughing Ceremony | May (variable date) | Agrarian ritual, harvest omens, great monarchical symbolism |
| Queen Mother’s Birthday | June 18 | Ceremonies and cultural shows in Phnom Penh |
| Constitution Day | September 24 | Recalls the return to constitutional monarchy |
| Pchum Ben (Ancestors’ Festival) | September/October (15 days, last days are holidays) | Food offerings to the deceased, family gatherings |
| Commemoration of the King-Father | October 15 | Tribute to the former monarch, solemn ceremonies |
| Coronation Day | October 29 | Anniversary of the current King’s accession to the throne |
| Independence Day | November 9 | Parades and ceremonies in Phnom Penh, fireworks |
| Water Festival (Bon Om Touk) | November (3 days) | Boat races, reversal of the Tonlé Sap flow, very festive atmosphere |
| Human Rights Day | December 10 | More institutional celebrations |
The two most sensitive periods socially are Khmer New Year and Pchum Ben. During these times, many Cambodians leave the capital for their home provinces, administrations and businesses slow down, and transportation is saturated. For a foreigner, anticipating travel (bookings, delays) is crucial.
Beyond public holidays, the year is punctuated by local festivals, arts festivals, urban celebrations around Angkor, and riverine or coastal fairs. Participating in these events is a privileged way to enter the culture, provided you respect the sometimes sacred dimension of certain ceremonies (especially those related to the memory of the genocide or ancestors).
The Relationship with Time, Slowness, and Bureaucracy
A recurring shock for expatriates comes from the relationship with time. Daily life generally flows more slowly than in Europe or North America. Administrative procedures lack clarity and uniformity; obtaining a document, a driver’s license, or a connection can take longer than expected and require multiple visits.
This pace is partly explained by a culture of patience, strongly influenced by Buddhism, but also by the weight of administrative hierarchy and a lack of standardization. This is often compounded by unclear communication from service counters, who don’t always dare to say “no” or “such and such document is missing.”
Administrative Culture in Laos
Rather than getting angry, which will cause the official to lose face and block the situation, an expatriate benefits from adopting a calm attitude, asking precise questions, and possibly returning accompanied by a Khmer speaker. In the long term, this patience and ability to navigate an imperfect system are part of the major learnings of expatriation.
Working in Cambodia: Hierarchy, Management, and the Unspoken
The Cambodian professional world largely reflects the values described above. The management style is generally vertical. Important decisions go up to the top, whether in a local company, an administration, or sometimes even subsidiaries of foreign groups adapting to this context.
Hierarchical superiors are rarely questioned in public. Meetings often serve to disseminate top-down information, less to debate or confront ideas. A young coworker—and especially a young female coworker—will have difficulty contradicting an elder, even if their official function would allow it.
Faced with this reality, many expatriates complain about a lack of initiative, a tendency to wait for very detailed instructions. This attitude stems as much from the fear of making a mistake (and the resulting loss of face) as from work practices inherited from previous decades.
For a foreign manager, adapting means:
– giving clear instructions, ideally in writing and rephrasing them to verify understanding;
– encouraging questions, explicitly explaining that there is no shame in not understanding;
– criticizing one-on-one, never in front of the team;
– publicly valuing everyone’s contributions to build confidence.
It can be useful to explain your own feedback culture: saying that, in your country, pointing out a problem is not attacking the person but seeking to improve the process. Still, caution is advised: brutal directness will be very poorly received.
Negotiating and Doing Business
In business, the relationship takes precedence over the contract. You don’t launch into tough negotiation before taking the time to build a connection: lunches, informal conversations about family, origin, interests. Trust is built gradually, sometimes over several meetings.
Discussions can be long and digressive. It is counterproductive to become impatient, raise your voice, or issue ultimatums. To reach a lasting agreement, prioritize mutual concessions that allow everyone to save face and present the outcome as a common gain.
Often, it is a high-ranking person who will ultimately decide. Only discussing with an intermediate-level contact without ever reaching the decision-maker can stall a project. Identifying who actually holds the arbitration power in a company or administration is therefore part of the preparatory work.
A few practices also play a non-negligible role: strict punctuality for professional appointments, exchanging business cards with both hands, neat and rather conservative attire. Appearances matter: a sloppy appearance will immediately be interpreted as a lack of respect.
Social Etiquette: Invitations, Meals, Gifts
Cambodian sociability is warm, with a strong dimension of hospitality. Being invited to someone’s home or for a meal is a sign of acceptance. Systematically refusing such invitations complicates building deep relationships, whether friendly or professional.
When entering a house, remove your shoes, take off your cap and sunglasses, and wait to be shown where to sit. Hosts generally offer a drink—water, tea, juice—or something to snack on. Even if you’re not very thirsty or hungry, accepting at least a small amount shows your respect and appreciation.
It is customary to bring a small gift, such as fruit, pastries, flowers, a bottle of wine, or a specialty from your country. Offer it with both hands. Usually, the gift is not opened in front of you but will be discovered later by your hosts.
Two details to know: white is associated with mourning, it’s better to avoid this color for wrapping; giving sharp objects (knives, scissors) is considered bad luck, thought to “cut” the relationship.
At the Table: A Few Essential Codes
Meals often take the form of a family-style service: several dishes are placed in the center and everyone serves themselves. Wait for the most elderly person, or the one who prepared the meal, to start eating. Out of politeness, it’s customary to try a little bit of everything.
The fork is mainly used to push food onto the spoon, which is brought to the mouth. It is important to never stick chopsticks vertically into a bowl of rice, as this evokes funeral offerings. Furthermore, it is preferable to use your right hand to serve yourself, as the left hand is traditionally associated with impure functions.
Things to avoid: blowing your nose ostentatiously at the table, speaking very loudly, burping without apologizing, reaching your arms over other people’s plates to grab a distant dish. A small bit of food left on the plate at the end of the meal can be interpreted as a sign that you are full; finishing every last crumb is not systematically expected.
Complimenting the cook or host (“it’s delicious”) is appreciated. Saying a few words in Khmer on the subject—for example chnganh (good, delicious)—often provokes delighted smiles.
Clothing and Appearance: Silent Communication
The Cambodian dress code is more conservative than in the West, even if young urbanites experiment more. As a general rule, cover shoulders and knees in public spaces. Mini-skirts, very short shorts, low-cut tank tops, ultra-tight clothing are poorly received outside very internationalized tourist areas.
At work, a clean, neat, and classic outfit is expected. For men: collared shirt and long pants; suit and tie for formal meetings. For women: dress or skirt below the knee, or pants, with a top that isn’t too low-cut. Too casual an outfit during a meeting with a monk, an official, or parents would be perceived as a lack of respect.
First impressions are quick and lasting: a person dressed sloppily will have more difficulty being seen as serious afterward. Conversely, a neat outfit, possibly enhanced with local details (krama scarf, traditional patterns), sends a message of integration and consideration.
On beaches and at pools, bathing suits are accepted, but full nudity is excluded. Many Cambodian women still swim wearing a T-shirt and shorts. To avoid causing offense, it’s better to choose a relatively covering swimsuit, especially outside beach tourist areas.
Gender, Social Roles, and Ongoing Evolutions
Cambodia is still shaped by deeply ingrained gender norms. Historically, distinct codes of conduct defined what a “good woman” or a “real man” should be. The Chbab Srey (code of conduct for women) emphasized gentleness, modesty, devotion to the home; the Chbab Proh valued strength, emotional restraint, and the position of head of the family.
Despite their removal from school curricula and laws guaranteeing equality, gender stereotypes continue to influence mentalities, particularly in rural areas. Women often bear a double burden, combining domestic tasks (cleaning, cooking, childcare, and care for elderly parents) with low-paying jobs. Men are still widely perceived as the main breadwinners and decision-makers within the household.
For an expatriate, this has several practical consequences. In some companies, it is common for the majority of entry-level positions to be held by women, especially in commerce and factories, while management positions remain very male-dominated. Women leaders report having to do more to be taken seriously, and their decisions are sometimes contested more easily than those of male counterparts.
In the private sphere, female sexuality remains taboo and virginity before marriage is valued, exposing women who deviate from this model to stigmatization. In contrast, society is more tolerant of male adventures, including paid ones.
However, things are changing. Young urban, more educated Cambodian women are accessing diverse roles, questioning certain traditional marital models, and demanding more equality in the distribution of domestic tasks. Public campaigns also invite redefining masculinity, fighting gender-based violence, and involving men in this change.
The expatriate will benefit from observing these dynamics without applying hasty judgments, supporting equality in their own practices (at work and at home), while considering the social constraints and risks faced by local women.
Health, Emotions, and Trauma: What Isn’t Said
The country still bears the scars of decades of war, notably the Khmer Rouge regime, which decimated a large part of the adult population and targeted monks, intellectuals, and professionals. Yet, psychological suffering remains rarely verbalized. Talking about depression, post-traumatic stress, or anxiety is often equated with madness. Consulting a psychologist is not a reflex; people turn rather to monks, traditional healers (kru Khmer), or ceremony officiants.
In some cultures, emotional restraint in public is highly valued. Reactions that may seem disproportionate must be understood in light of a collective background often marked by family histories of violence, mass mourning, or deportation, rarely discussed. Losing control in public (screaming, crying) is generally perceived as shameful.
Conversely, preventive medicine is not yet deeply rooted: if “it doesn’t hurt,” people don’t consult. Healthcare structures are improving but remain unequal. Many expatriates choose private clinics or go to Thailand or Singapore for major procedures.
Living with Culture Shock: Adaptation, Frustrations, and Learnings
Arriving in Cambodia almost always triggers a series of emotional phases: initial enthusiasm, then disorientation, irritation with the slowness, misunderstandings, stifling heat, road or cleanliness issues. Specialists estimate that about 95% of expatriates go through a sensitive period around the first six months, with marked ups and downs.
One of the keys to getting through this period is to accept the legitimacy of your emotions while refusing to settle into complaint. It helps to remind yourself that it is you who is “different” in this new context, not the other way around. This awareness allows you to adopt a learner’s posture, open to discovery, rather than a judge’s posture.
Opening up to the language—even a few Khmer words: Arkun (thank you), Som Dtoh</strong (sorry), Bah/Jah (yes masculine/feminine)—radically transforms interactions. Smiles become more complicit, merchants become more patient, neighbors more talkative.
Another challenge: avoid cutting yourself off from local society by staying only in an expatriate bubble—bars, parties, circles where only English or French is spoken while rehashing the country’s flaws. In the long term, this withdrawal breeds bitterness. Seeking to build real relationships with Cambodians—colleagues, neighbors, community partners—offers a deeper and more nuanced understanding.
A Few Practical Landmarks for the First Days
Even if each journey is unique, certain practical points often come up in testimonials.
In the city, many Cambodians speak more or less correct English, a legacy of both the French colonial period and the recent opening to tourism. But in the provinces, Khmer clearly dominates. Signing up for language classes or practicing with apps helps break the initial barrier.
Traffic can be a source of culture shock, as rules, although they exist, are often interpreted with flexibility, creating traffic that can seem chaotic to those used to a highly regulated environment. To adapt, it is advisable to observe first, travel as a passenger, then drive cautiously once local practices are better understood. This progressive approach helps avoid many stressful situations.
On a social level, an expatriate must accept that their status sparks curiosity and sometimes prejudices: being perceived both as holding economic privileges, a source of opportunities or fantasies, but also as a transient being, whose real commitment remains to be proven. Time, consistency in relationships, modesty, and daily reliability are the best tools to overcome these initial projections.
Why This Cultural Difference Can Become a Source of Wealth
Beyond the difficulties, confronting Cambodian culture forces a review of many reflexes: the valorization of self-assertion, the belief in the spontaneous equality of individuals, the tendency to go straight to the point. It requires developing finer listening skills, greater attention to weak signals, and a more conscious respect for the dignity of others.
Living in a society where the collective matters, where elders are cared for, where people spontaneously gather to build a house, organize a ceremony, share the little they have, also reminds us that another relationship with success and time is possible.
For the expatriate, accepting to learn rather than impose one’s own frameworks transforms cultural differences into a lesson in humility, patience, and gratitude. This experience allows one to rediscover the essentials: the value of a shared meal, a helpful neighbor, a close-knit family, or a ritual that punctuates daily life.
Expatriating to Cambodia is therefore not just about changing your address. It’s about accepting to enter a deep conversation with a culture marked by both a tragic past and an astonishing capacity for gentleness and resilience. Understanding cultural differences is not a manual of politeness: it’s the gateway to a life experience that can, in turn, profoundly transform the expatriate.
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Cyril Jarnias is an independent expert in international wealth management with over 20 years of experience. As an expatriate himself, he is dedicated to helping individuals and business leaders build, protect, and pass on their wealth with complete peace of mind.
On his website, cyriljarnias.com, he shares his expertise on international real estate, offshore company formation, and expatriation.
Thanks to his expertise, he offers sound advice to optimize his clients' wealth management. Cyril Jarnias is also recognized for his appearances in many prestigious media outlets such as BFM Business, les Français de l’étranger, Le Figaro, Les Echos, and Mieux vivre votre argent, where he shares his knowledge and know-how in wealth management.
